Archives For raising children with lupus

You know when you log into Facebook and you see that status box asking you, “What’s on your mind?” I laugh and think, well there are a lot of things on my mind. But, nevertheless I don’t do a status update. I tend to be the person that only posts the occasional update, but mostly I post pictures. So I decided to compile some of the things I could have posted on my status update but never did. Better late than never, right?

  1. That perfume I’m wearing… it’s probably just spit up. Yeah, I know. #Sorry #MomLife #ImUsedToIt
  2. Breastfeeding is really really hard at first, but then it gets really really easy. #HangInThere
  3. Laundry, you are my nemesis! #EnoughSaid #AintNoBodyGotTimeForThat
  4. Does it count as a date night if we just sit at home and watch The Voice? #Sure #WhyNot
  5. Falling asleep on the couch during The Voice. #Fail
  6. Playing Legos, sword fighting & building forts. #momofboys. #Favorite #LoveTheseMoments
  7. Watching your oldest make your youngest laugh. #TheBest #BeStillMyHeart
  8. Preparing homeschool lessons. #LearningIsFun #HomeschoolLife
  9. I made myself a dessert once the kids were in bed. #IDidntWantToShare #DontJudge
  10. Please Lord let the little one sleep. #SleepIsOverrated #WeCanSleepWhenWeAreOld

It’s hard to believe that in a about a week my littlest guy will be four months old! Where does the time go? Just like I did with Eli, I took a few months off from blogging to get adjusted to our new normal. With my first post back I wanted to take the time to write about Ephraim’s birth.

{Don’t worry, I’m not an overshare-er when it comes to that sort of thing} 

After two years we are finally a family of 4!

After two years we are finally a family of 4!

With Eli my husband made a video while we were at the hospital, documenting the family that came to visit and those precious moments when we got to hold him for the first time. We love having those memories captured and did the same for Ephraim as well. The video is not done being edited, but once it is I will gladly be sharing it with you.

Well to start off, this pregnancy was much harder than my first. Granted I was four years older so that definitely plays into it I’m sure! But, I also didn’t know that I had Lupus with my first pregnancy. Thankfully, my Lupus tends to be less active during pregnancy, so even though this time around it was much harder, I am grateful that overall everything went well.

I love the excitement in Eli's eyes! He loves his brother!

I love the excitement in Eli’s eyes! He loves his brother!

I was induced at 38 weeks this time around and that was completely different. I liked it, yet didn’t like it all at the same time. With my first I went into labor on my own at 39 weeks. I loved the excitement of getting to call family and tell them we were headed to the hospital. This time it was nice that our family got to plan ahead of time for the delivery. But, man was it hard sleeping the night before being induced! It’s like being a kid again the night before Christmas! My mind was constantly spinning thinking about the next morning.

We headed to the hospital around five in the morning. It was super weird just walking into the hospital knowing I was having a baby that day and yet I wasn’t currently in any pain like I was last time since I showed up to the hospital in labor with my first. Another thing that was super weird was being able to sit in our room at the hospital and watch tv since I was waiting for the induction to start. They said to rest while I waited, but that wasn’t going to happen! Once they began to induce me everything progressed rather quickly. My labor started around 7:00AM and Ephraim was born at 1:20PM.

Hello my sweet boy!

Hello my sweet boy!

Those moments after he was born was absolutely perfect. Our oldest had to go to the NICU for a few hours. They literally handed him to me for a few seconds and then took him away, I didn’t see him again for about seven hours. It was horrible! But this time around everything went so smoothly! I got to hold him, cuddle him and introduce him to his big brother and the rest of our family! No NICU visits for us this time! Yay! It was truly wonderful!

 

Christmas 2014

December 17, 2014 — Leave a comment

It’s that time of year again when families send out their Christmas cards. Well, this is the fourth year that our family has opted out of the Christmas card and instead made a Christmas video. We absolutely love making these videos, it’s a lot of fun and we get to capture precious moments with our kiddos while making great memories.

Merry Christmas from my family to yours!

 

Layman Christmas 2014 from Chase Layman on Vimeo.

I am sure that we have all heard the debates about whether moms should work outside the home. I have heard it said that women can’t win, if they work outside the home then they must love their kids less. If they stay home then they don’t want to contribute to society or to their family financially. If we listen to society and these debates then yes, women can’t win. There is no way that we could please everyone with these two options. But, it really shouldn’t be about society and what others think of you as a parent. It is about what God thinks, what your family needs and what you feel about yourself! I left my job a month before my son was born and thought that I would be a stay-at-home mom forever. It’s funny how we make plans for ourselves but God’s plans usually end up in the opposite direction. Here are 10 things I have learned from being a working mom.

  1. Your Child Loves You! My little guy loves me and that love did not change because I went back to work. I visit him every day at lunch and he always has a bright smile and begins to tell me with excitement about his day. His love is unconditional. For that I am grateful. It is all too easy as a mom to make ourselves feel guilty for a number of things. But, our children see us more graciously than we see ourselves.
  2. More Intentional. I have always tried to be intentional with our family time. I never wanted to be the family that all we did was watch TV together. But, it is easy to do when you stay _MG_2659at home all day. Once I began to work outside the home I have found that our family time became more intentional. Less TV time and more playing games, going to the park, evening walks and lots of lego time. It’s not that we were less intentional before, it’s more that we cherish every moment and want to make it count. Even if it is simply hanging out at the house running around like robots.
  3. God Knows Best! Our plans are just that, they are ours. God’s plans typically will differ from what we planned. But, I have learned through the years that He always has a reason for what He does and His plans are always better than I could have done myself.
  4. Making Friends. There is nothing more special than watching my son make friends! He gets excited every day when he walks in to a room full of his best buddies. In our families situation it was not always easy to spend time with friends when I wasn’t working because we are a one car family. Many days we were stuck at home. This has offered a chance for my little guy to play with friends on a regular basis.
  5. No Lesser. I do not feel that being a working parent makes you any lesser of a parent than staying at home. Both roles are extremely important and both roles work hard. It’s easy to tell yourself that you are lesser because you are not home, but this is a lie that we are telling ourselves. Remember, our child loves us unconditionally and sometimes working is what your family needs. Doing what your family needs does not make you lesser! _MG_3138
  6. Always A Mom. This is plan and simple but sometimes you just need to remind yourself that you are a mom no matter if you work from an office or if you work from home. Moms love their children, look out for their best interest and care for their needs. This is true of working moms just as it is true of stay at home moms.
  7. The Mold. There is no perfect mold. Just because you have friends that work or friends that stay home doesn’t mean that you must do what they do. Sometimes what your family needs is not what you even expected. Every family is different, every situation is different and only you know the needs of your family. Don’t feel guilty for knowing the needs of your family!
  8. No One Is Perfect. You will not be perfect in either situation. If you work, you will have days that you feel like a failure as a parent. If you stay at home you will have days that you feel like a failure as a parent. The parenting thing is not easy. Don’t believe the lie that other people have it together, because we are all learning as we go. We are all doing the best that we can, but the truth is that no one is perfect. We will mess up. But, instead of feeling guilty we should lift each other up and support one another because parenting is hard!
  9. Struggles. The grass is not greener on the other side. I have done both and have thoroughly enjoyed both. But, each come with their own struggles, even if you can’t see it when looking in. Working you struggle with juggling your time, stress of the job, and all things parenting. Staying at home you struggle with all things parenting, being isolated, and often times a tight budget. Let’s stop putting up a front and just be transparent with each other. It’s okay to say that you are having  a bad day!
  10. Calling. I firmly believe that if God called you to it, then your family will not be content and thriving unless you are obedient. This is true in either scenario. No matter if God called you to work or if God called you to stay home, you will only ever find true joy being in the will of God!